There’s a funny ad from Fruit of the Loom (from 2014 and still making its rounds) about who you should and shouldn’t gift underwear to. I somewhat agree with the ad – you probably shouldn’t give a cop who pulls you over some packaged underwear. And, I also think people truly miss out on the opportunity to give their loved ones thoughtful intimates gifts.

PS: This blog post was originally written in 2016. It’s been updated in 2019 with different or additional links and advice. It also may contain affiliate links. As always I only share what makes me say hurray and what I know will truly support you. 

What are Intimate Gifts

To me, the term “intimates” covers a lot of ground in the fashion world. It’s pretty much anything that you’d wear underneath your clothing or to bed. Items that fall into the intimates category to me: bras, underwear, lingerie, loungewear, sleepwear, and several accessories. There are plenty of other “intimate” gifts to give, like pleasure toys and kinky stuff, which are (mostly) left out of this list. 

These options are gifts that you can give to someone you care about on your list, someone who is in your intimate circle of loved ones and on your list of “people I actually want to give a gift to”. Being in the intimates business for such a long time (since 2005), I can see what an impact these items can have on you and your loved ones.

With that in mind, here are a few of my favorite treats from the intimates world to gift to your friends and family for Christmas, Hannukah, and any other time. And though I’m known to give underwear to just about everyone on my list (probably including a cop if he pulled me over), I’ve got several options rounded up for you. Let someone know you care. Let them see that you think about them. Put some hurray in their day.

Sister

Sisters might love the fun, silly, underwear gifts, but you can also be real real real with her. I mean, my sister and I (I have five brothers and only one sister) have no shame when it comes to our chats. So, a few ideas:

• Lingerie Accessories. Because you two problem-solve for each other. From bra strap converters {like the one above} to fashion tape, or a low-back converter, these make great stocking stuffers. 
• Nipples Covers. Go with something flirty and fun, or totally practical. There are plenty to choose from and I especially love the seamless Dimrs style!
• Comfortable thongs. I swear I have gotten my sister and my sister-in-laws hooked on thongs because I introduced them to styles that are cute AND comfortable to wear. Change your sister’s life with one of my top comfortable thong recommendations like the Hanky Panky, or Miel thongs!

Best Friend

You’ve got her back – and her backside! Best friends deserve something really fun and special. Let’s face it, you can talk to your girlfriends about anything. ANY.THING. So what’s to stop you from giving her a pair of underwear you know she’ll love?

I think giving fun underwear to friends is totally fun! Especially if there’s a girl power element involved.

• Period underwear. Your cycles are already synced, so might as well, right? This Pros and Cons of Period Underwear blog lays out all the different options, and if they really work. (Bonus, a few are SUPER cute, just like you and your BFF. Aw.) Plus you can get $10 off with my Thinx affiliate link: www.SheThinx.com/Kimmay 
• Bralettes (with Pretty Backs). Because you two keep each other stylish and comfortable. Shop bralettes for your full bust friends, or read up on The Pros and Cons of Bralettes. Bonus if it has a pretty back because of the aforementioned “you’ve got her back” thing that applies here, too. Try one of my favorite pretty back bralettes from Fleur’t. 

Mom

Mom deserves the best. So don’t skimp on this one! And sometimes the best thing you can give is your time together. If you and your momma get along, I highly suggest going for a bra fitting together. You two can bond while shopping for bras! I don’t mean go to the department store and aimlessly browse the racks or rely on an unknowledgeable sales associate to bring you bras in a badly lit dressing room. I mean work with a pro bra fitter in a pretty boutique or elegant setting. Afterwards, pop a bottle of bubbly and go out for brunch in your new bras – make a whole day of it!

Other gift ideas for mom:

• Cooling PJs: this classic sleepwear from Lusomé is designed to keep her cool. Because hot flashes are a real thing and are really un-cool.
• 2 for 1 Pretty Robe: Moms tend to be practical so make her proud and browse through the Robes You And Style Indoors and Out & About blog and get her something she can wear multiple ways!

Partner

Working in the lingerie business for over a decade, and being with my husband for almost as long, have given me quite the perspective on men giving lingerie or underwear as a gift. In bra fitting shops and upscale department stores, I have seen men shop with love, respect, and care for a woman. And I have seen them degrade a woman and treat her like property. Boy, do I have some stories for you. But for now, let’s focus on that loving, respectful type of partner. Those are my favorite kind.

Whatever the gender of your loved one or partner, take great care when gifting intimates gifts! You can go sexy, practical, fun, or all of the above. 

• Lingerie: Don’t be afraid to go for the sexy lingerie for your paramour. Just make sure it’s something that’s actually a gift for them, or both of you, not just for you. In other words, don’t dress them up like your little doll for your pleasure and expect them to say “thanks”. Ask and listen to what they want, and give them something that makes them say hurray.That means you may even skip the “sexy” stuff and give them something cozy. Trust me, helping your partner feel their most beautiful and adored will be a win-win for the both of you. For something cute and inexpensive, try SheIn. This website is peppered with great lingerie gift ideas. Or go high-end and well made with a french brand like Simone Perele (above). Shop bra brands for all budgets.

• Underwear for men. Let me just say, my husband is a true dude from the midwest who loves sports. Gender norms aside, his underwear choices were very, um, basic. So when I asked him to test out some brands and their well engineered, soft on the skin, and superbly designed styles – he hasn’t gone back. And he doesn’t want to. He actually said that. I did not make that up. In fact, when I included a bunch of pairs of his favorite brand, Tommy John, in his gift box he yelled: “Underwear! Yes!” He is a changed man. And I’m very grateful. No more basic, boring, undies anymore!

Mother-in-Law

This can be tricky. I’m so lucky to have a really awesome mother-in-law and step-mother-in-law. In fact, I’m fairly certain I’ve given them (and every other female in my family) underwear. I think it was actually a thong. But I know this is treading on thin ice here. So I say to play it cool and get her something that is both sophisticated and comfortable.

• Warm, layering pieces. Cozy up to your MIL with these soft, warm gifts. Try sophisticated thermals or classic basics from Hanro.
• Lingerie care items. Show her you’re responsible and caring with these useful items. I give lingerie soap to just about everyone I care about – including my actual mother-in-law! Check out my Care page for more details and shop Soak or other great soaps.

A loved one in recovery

Every once in awhile I ask myself if what I’m doing on this site, or in my business matters. I suppose it’s normal for these fears to pop up. And pretty much every time I have that doubt, someone confirms that I am on the right path. One such case was right after I wrote my article on Taking the Taboo out of Mastectomy Lingerie. I had been introduced to a woman at my co-working office, by someone I already knew. When she heard I was writing about beautiful lingerie for breast cancer survivors, her interest was peeked. I gave her my card. A few weeks later, she came by my office and said she’d read my article and had been looking for me. What she told me next both shocked and warmed my heart.

She mentioned that a friend of hers, just 26 years old, had been diagnosed with breast cancer and had just undergone a double mastectomy. She and her friends wanted desperately to show they care and support her, and were clueless on how to do it. After seeing my article, they realized that there were brands that made post surgical lingerie and loungewear that was beautiful, soft, and well made. She came down directly to tell me how thankful she was, and that they were planning on getting her the robe with a built-in drainage tube belt from AnaOno that I wore during the #HurrayVacay in Mexico. She had tears in her eyes as she thanked me for giving her the advice, which in turn provided her with an opportunity to show how much she and her pals care about their friend in recovery.

If you have a friend who is recovering from breast surgery, here are my favorite gifts to give and a few helpful resources:

• The Most Taboo Lingerie I’ve Ever Worn (Hurray Kimmay)
• First Bra Foundation (The Lingerie Journal)
• How to (Really) Relax and Enjoy a Vacation (Hurray Kimmay featuring AnaOno)
• Bustle Facebook LIVE Mastectomy and Post Surgical Lingerie (Facebook Video)
• 22 Women Share the Powerful Lessons They’ve Learned Through Breast Cancer (ClassPass)
• Taking the Taboo Out of Breast Cancer Lingerie (The Lingerie Journal)
• Lingerie, Loungewear, and Swimwear for Breast Cancer Survivors (About.com)

Yourself

OK, you are most THE most important person on your list. So, ask your friends and loved ones for these items above, or gift them to yourself. Get more ideas on my Resource Underneath page, and browse through the blog posts and shopping lists! 

You can use lingerie and intimates to help you learn how to treat yourself with honor, respect, and compassion. And ultimately, say hurray.

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Your turn: Have you ever given an intimates gift to someone? How did it go? Have you asked for items like this before? Have you given them to yourself? What on this list would make you say hurray? Share with me here!

PS: The photos above were taken by Becky Yee during several #HurrayVacay trips to Puerto Rico, Mexico, Paris, LA, and Guatemala. One in Paris was by the Laura Boyd. One was just with my phone of the Soak Wash hehe Zero editing or airbrushing to my body. Because loving it just as it is is the BEST gift of all.